I have not updated my journal for 5 weeks, I am so bad!
All the major issues in one post!

Socialist Worker
I really like Hugo Chavez at the moment. A true Socialist leader who does try to help the poor. No leader is perfect but he is giving cheap Venezuelan oil to help the poorest people in New York, London and some other city that I cant remember! It shows we have no Socialist party in the UK really anymore and I love anyone who openly and publicly slags off George Bush.

The Pope
I dislike the man immensely and hate the fact he has an open platform to spread hate and conservative right wing views however all the furore over this speech was taken out of context. I cant be arsed to read the whole lecture he gave, but I hope that he gave some more examples of pro Muslim literature and writings. I am very scared though of the fact that you cannot criticise or say anything bad about Islam or Muslims. If I am allowed free speech then I am allowed to criticise without fear of death. A comment taken out of context is then used to cause rioting and violence and death threats. However much the Pope apologises I dont think this is going to end well for the Catholic church or the Pope against extremist fanatics.

The Stress of Living
When it was my birthday last May my parents brought me a gift voucher for a friend of the families Salon. She has opened a tiny one which is really really popular and is more about health and relaxation rather than beauty and does things like proper massages, acupuncture etc. I went for reflexology with the family friend and I have had it many times in the past but was very nervous and anxious about it, in this place and in a tiny room. I have only ever had it at home before that. It was really really relaxing and I have never been so relaxed! It made me realise that I don't do enough. I need to do nothing and relax more! Its a very great feeling that I have coped, an ecstatic feeling.

The Lesbian
Some friends of my parents have daughters who are the same age as me and my brother and apparetly they have a shocking secret. Actually they don't really and my mum just mentioned at the weekend just casually that their oldest daughter who is the same age as me has in my mothers exact words 'going through a lesbian phase and moved in with a lady'. Strangely my parents are not homophobic at all, although they don't know about me. I feel really proud for their daughter and wanna find out her email address now to send her a email! 'congratulations you are a lesbian!' lol

The Girlfriend
After my last post 5 weeks ago (here) where I was upset that my brother and his girlfriend had split up. I had no reason to get upset, they like split up and then were seeing each other again. They are like so volatile and keep getting back together and then splitting and then getting back together. But I am glad that its not like really over and she is in floods of tears etc. They have rows and then they are fine! Relationships are so complex and after a fight they don't want to get back together as a 'relationship' because its 'too soon' yet spend all their time together and if they are 'separate' surely they can see other people, yet there is probably no way that would happen. Anyway she said she would keep in touch with me whatever happened!

The Darkness
I can't believe it gets dark so early in the evening now! It feels so autumny and winter now! Its nearly the end of September now! I want Summer back!

Tags: beliefs, family, gay, politics, world
Current Mood: contemplative

Having a bit of a depressing night. I go from nearly always happy-go-lucky to very rarely feeling a bit down! I think I am nearly always happy-go-lucky because I try to blank all bad stuff out of my head! Its the way to live until your head explodes! I broke my computer this week which is really annoying me argh! I do everything on my laptop but still have my desktop and all my pictures, music and files are all still on it and I was getting them wirelessy! argh I cant get any of my stored music! I have to repair it or go insane! I had pictures to post on here, but they are also currently trapped! grrr

Its funny how you change throughout your life. Like how people tend to get more conservative as they get older! I pray I don't become right wing, racist, and against everyone as I get older. But your tastes change in people, in music, in tv and in food! I used to hate baked beans and orange juice as a child and now like them! I also now like avocado! weirdly I still hate orange juice with 'bits'! I hate anything with bits or lumps in! like yoghurt's with bits of fruit! I just cant handle them! lol

Last year I noticed my viewpoints changing. I became a lot more sceptical and questioning about everything. I do believe in a lot of things, but I do question everything far more! I need evidence to myself to prove things!
I have become much more secular in my religious views. I don't want to be a part of or support any religion any more. If they help you fine, but its just something that's no longer for me any more. Which leads me to....

Today a fabulous comedian died called Linda Smith, who died at the age of 48 from Ovarian Cancer (news story). She mostly was on the radio but one thing I didn't know about her until today was that she was the President of the British Humanist Association which is a group which worries about the rise of religious fundamentalism, the influence of religion in politics and the segregation of people due to religion and is very concerned about human rights but believes in humanity and human nature. ~ I had never even heard of it before today! According to its page on Wikipedia right here it has lots of celebrity members!

I am considering joining, its looks interesting!

It is cold outside! Apparently we are gonna get some snow over the next couple of days!

Tags: beliefs
Current Mood: awake